Nearly all the posts are bilingual.
Presque tous les articles sont bilingues.

English spoken. On parle français. (وكمان منفهم عربي، حبيبي)

Most of this blog's contents is subject to copyright. For instance, many of the latest illustrations I've made myself. I'm the cooperative type. If you intend to borrow some material, please contact me by leaving a comment. :-)
La plupart du contenu de ce blog est soumis aux droits d'auteurs. Par exemple, nombre des illustrations les plus récentes sont faites par moi. Je suis du genre coulant. Si vous comptez emprunter du contenu, SVP contactez-moi en laissant un commentaire. :-)

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Guinness record

A lebanese hotel, in the classy Broumana area, has just entered the Guinness Book of Records, with the world's biggest royal suite.
Sure, it's an honor, etc, etc... Bravo, mabrook, mashallah, congratulations, woulouloulouloulou, callooh, callay, and other joyous chortles.
But coming from a country where the economical crisis rivals the poverty boom, a country which "solicits" generous international donations (donations which, by the way, tend to vanish as soon as they are cashed in), I wonder whether a world luxury record is good "Public Relations". Would YOU give much to a beggar whose genuine Rolex is bigger than yours?
I think I'll rather start a collection for the "poor United States", whose debt is beating all records in written history. "Spare sum change, guv'nor? It's for buying a sandwich to poor George W. Bush. Before the hypoglycemia affects his intelligence."
Already, I hear that the SUV sales are free-falling in the States. While in Lebanon, you see more and more of them on the roads, and brand new ones. Poverty? Not for everybody! Some people's main concern is to show that they have moolah to throw away.
"Well, I'm taking this coin for POOR Prince John." - Sheriff of Nottingham, in Disney's Robin Hood

Un hôtel libanais, dans la classieuse région de Broumana, vient d'entrer dans le Livre Guinness des Records, avec la plus grande suite royale du monde.
Bien sûr, c'est un honneur, etc, etc... Bravo, mabrouk, mashallah, congratulations, woulouloulouloulou, callooh, callay, et autres brâlements de joie.
Mais concernant un pays où la crise économique rivalise avec l'explosion de la pauvreté, un pays qui "sollicite" de généreux dons internationaux (des dons qui d'ailleurs ont vite fait de disparaître aussitôt perçus), je me demande si un record mondial de luxe représente de bonnes "relations publiques". Vous donneriez beaucoup, vous, à un mendiant dont la Rolex véritable est plus grosse que la vôtre?
Je vais plutôt lancer une collecte pour les "pauvres Etats-Unis", dont la dette bat tous les records de l'histoire écrite. "A votre bon cœur, m'sieudames, c'est pour payer un p'tit sandwich à George W. Bush. Avant que l'hypoglycémie n'affecte son intelligence."
Déjà, il paraît que les ventes de 4x4 sont en chute libre aux States. Alors qu'au Liban, on en voit de plus en plus sur les routes, et flambants neufs. Pauvreté? Pas pour tout le monde! Il y en a dont le principal souci est de montrer qu'ils ont du flouze à claquer par les fenêtres.
"Eh bien, je prends cette pièce pour le PAUVRE Prince Jean." - Shériff de Nottingham, dans
Robin des Bois de Disney


Anonymous said...

Are we speaking of actual rolexes here, symbolic rolexes? 'Cause I know I'm totally threatened by a guy whose rolex is bigger than mine.

Anonymous said...

Who am I kidding? No one's is bigger - that's where I got the name. Max Power got his off a hair dryer. I got mine a different way.

Alex said...

I see a great opportunity here. I can buy up cheap, almost new SUV's and ship them the your corner of the world and rake in a huge profit.


$4:50 per gallon at the cheap station for regular now!!!

Oh, remember that old insurance scam, where you have a beaten up car, and you drive in front of someone, then slam the brakes on so their insurance has to pay you...

Now owners of SUV are pulling that trick to get out of purchase agreements and leases, so they can get a Corolla or Prius.

Pascal [P-04referent] said...

Oh innocent one! Would you really think there was any opportunity left on the lebanese market for some foreigner without political support? What, you a cousin of the Saudi Ambassador or Condi's bro-in-law, maybe?

Just wait until you reach customs. It took me two months to recover three trunks of ordinary personal luggage, AND I had inside support.
[Note to self: Consider possibility that maybe Uncle George is jinxed. Or verily disliked by his colleagues.]

Kio said...

It's been a while since I had a good laugh.

Nice article, as always, dear Pascal :)

Pascal [P-04referent] said...

Thanks. And I'm happy to see what the tone of your last post indicates about your morale.

I'm making efforts not to neglect the "humor" part of my blog. To help the whole world smile a little more. :-)

The usefulness of jesters always was unfairly underestimated, wasn't it? JOKERS, UNITE! :o)

Anonymous said...

Careful, kio. Some people get pretty uptight with these comments that don't add anything to a discussion!

Kio said...

I couldn’t agree more dear!!
'I am indebted to my parents for living, but to my funny friends for living happily.'
(ok ok so Alexander the Great will excuse me for altering his quote!) :)
been a while since I logged here, missed your article mate..

Joe, point noted;
Thanks for the heads up.

Kio said...


Pascal [P-04referent] said...

Actually, the uptight people (or person?) don't seem to have followed me on my own blog ("1827 views + comments and still unmoderated").
Kio, Joe was just making a semi "private joke" at the Resident Anonymous Flamer on our friend Eolake's blog.
That guy (? gal? hermaphrodite? fag? dyke? old bag? barking dog? protozoa? political speech brought to life? computer prion? Nobody knows) loves to hate me. But I guess all that matters to him/her/it is to annoy Eolake.
Or TRY to. Because some amazing people seem virtually unannoyable!

You gotta hand it to the R.A.F. (doesn't even know that *I* gave him/her/it that nickname): has some persistence. Then again, so does a pebble in your shoe...

Note to all: I'm hoping that one day you'll read on this blog about one of the funniest AND most interesting thing you've ever read. Not before a few months, though. But your fidelity will be greatly rewarded.

Some day in the History of the Cosmos. ;-)

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