Nearly all the posts are bilingual.
Presque tous les articles sont bilingues.

English spoken. On parle français. (وكمان منفهم عربي، حبيبي)

Most of this blog's contents is subject to copyright. For instance, many of the latest illustrations I've made myself. I'm the cooperative type. If you intend to borrow some material, please contact me by leaving a comment. :-)
La plupart du contenu de ce blog est soumis aux droits d'auteurs. Par exemple, nombre des illustrations les plus récentes sont faites par moi. Je suis du genre coulant. Si vous comptez emprunter du contenu, SVP contactez-moi en laissant un commentaire. :-)

Monday, June 15, 2009

Electionator 2 : Revenge of Grand-Papa

It wouldn't be fair of me to umbilicise by solely speaking of my own country. In Albania too ("no, I'm not Albanese, LE-BA-NESE!"), they have elections with riveting traditions. There, no later than on June 28th, legislatives, exactly like we just did. My, it really is a small world!
What's interesting, in Albania, is how much Jeanne Calment's official record seems ridiculous. More than 17,000 Albanians inscribed on the voting lists (and whose death the Administration never officially registered, therefore they're certainly still alive, quod erat demonstrandum) are 90 to 159 years old, and many of them were born in the XIXth century. You see? So it IS true that the mediterranean regime is longevity-ensuring food!!!
Oh, sure, there are always a few pedants to periodically insinuate that old age contradicts Democracy. The Interior Ministry argumented that these persons could not be removed from the voting lists as long as their passing away hadn't been made official. «We don't find this position reasonable, from the Socialist Party, to consider any person older than 90 as deceased», the Ministry added. They're right. This Kastriot Islami (authentic name!), in charge of elections matters in the Socialist Party and who's angrifully raising the topic, is nothing but a tiresome grump griping because he can already guess who the senior citizens will be voting for! Definitely NOT for the heirs of the mediterran... stalinian regime that's been so painful to bear with!
It's fortunate that in this former communist country, candidate to joining the European Union, people are evolved, modern, civilised, and they long ceased believing in vampires, vroukolakas and other undeads...
Furthermore, senior citizens traditionally vote in great numbers, so I bet these stinkin' commies will really get it in the djopa.
Right, gotta go, I'm having a live online chat with a candidate to the Romanian regionals, an aristocrat bearing the pretty name of Vlad Tepesh.


Vladracol Albanovitch, age 159 and still kicking, vowing to vote as usual.
Vladracol AlbanovitchVladracol Albanovitch, 159 ans et toujours vaillant, bien décidé à voter comme d'habitude.

Tyranna Lazombinova, a young cutie barely aged 141.
Tyranna LazombinovaTyranna Lazombinova, une mignonne jeunette de seulement 141 ans.


Ce ne serait pas équitable que je nombrilise en ne parlant que de mon pays. En Albanie aussi ("non, je ne suis pas Albanais, LI-BA-NAIS!"), ils ont des élections aux traditions captivantes. Tenez, pas plus tard que le 28 juin, des législatives, exactement comme chez nous. Décidément, le monde est petit!
L'intéressant, en Albanie, c'est combien le record officiel de Jeanne Calment paraît ridicule. Plus de 17.000 Albanais inscrits sur les listes électorales (et dont l'Administration n'a jamais enregistré le décès, donc ils sont certainement toujours vivants, CQFD) sont âgés de 90 à 159 ans, et bon nombre d'entre eux sont nés au XIXe siècle. Quand on vous disait que le régime méditerranéen, c'est une alimentation qui assure la longévité!!!
Bien sûr, il se trouve toujours des cuistres pour insinuer périodiquement que la vieillesse est contraire à la Démocratie. Le ministère de l'Intérieur a fait valoir qu'on ne pouvait rayer ces personnes des listes électorales tant que leur décès n'était pas officialisé. «Nous n'estimons pas raisonnable, de la part du Parti socialiste, de considérér comme morte toute personne âgée de plus de 90 ans», ajoute le ministère. Ils ont raison. Ce Kastriot Islami (nom authentique!), responsable des questions électorales au Parti socialiste et qui soulève colériquement la question, n'est qu'un fâcheux qui râle parce qu'il sent déjà pour qui les Seniors vont voter! Sûrement pas pour les héritiers du régime méditerran... stalinien qui leur en a tant fait voir!
Heureusement que dans cet ancien pays communiste, candidat à l'adhésion à l'Union Européenne, on est évolués, modernes, civilisés, et depuis longtemps on ne croit plus aux vampires, vroukolakas et autres morts-vivants...
En plus, les Seniors votent traditionnellement en grand nombre, donc je parie que ces cocos puants vont vraiment l'avoir dans le
djopa.
Bon, je vous laisse, j'ai un tchat en
live avec un candidat aux régionales Roumaines, un aristocrate joliment nommé Vlad Tepesh.

6 comments:

Joe Dick said...

More than 17,000 Albanese inscribed on the voting lists (and whose death the Administration never officially registered, therefore they're certainly still alive, quod erat demonstrandum) are 90 to 159 years old, and many of them were born in the XIXth century.

Is your new leader's name Side Show Bob? He's a past master of electoral fraud!

Pascal [P-04referent] said...

[I fixed this one to "Albanians". Where was my head when I re-typed "Albanese" without there being a joke?]

Actually, no. Our new leader's name is Sly Man Mike.

And apart from a few ten thousands expatriates getting massively flown in with free tickets for voting day, and a record figure of about 850 million dollars that were spent in buying votes, the June 7th caucus was absolutely pristine and transparent, I can absolutely guarantee you!
That's PRECISELY why the PWNED didn't win. We hadn't been informed that this one was by the rules!!! That withholding of information was a really underhanded nasty trick. Boo!

It's like in Monopoly. You absolutely NEED to know which set of rules applies if you don't want to lose your shirt.

Pascal [P-04referent] said...

P.S.: That's $850 million for a country of about 4 million inhabitants.

And by the way, I need to ask: where the fwazz are MY $212.50 (plus tax)?
There was clearly some discrimination among voters, I can tell you that...

Jimbo said...

It's strange how the corruption could be so open, and no one does anything. Either other countries are better at hiding it, or it doesn't go on.

Pascal [P-04referent] said...

Our "objective Western observers" found nothing to object(!) or even comment about, during our last elections. So much for my illusions about Jimmy Carter...

But I'm not implying it's got anything to do with the surprise massive victory of the pro-Western side, contradicting all previous serious opinion polls...

No sir, I'm not implying ANYTHING. Now move along, people... No specifics of Lebanese politics discussed on THIS blog. I'm but an honest neutral pirate, oh Caesar.

Pascal [P-04referent] said...

BTW, these drawings are not mine, I only slightly edited them. Though I *could* do better, if only I had a working scanner and took the time. Some day...

These are borrowed from the France edition of "le Journal de Mickey".
The boy is by Aré, in his series "the Potatoes" (about three teenage TV addicts).
The girl is by Cazenove & William, from the cutesy series "the Sisters".
There. Copyright mentioned where it's due. Now only 217 posts left to fix.

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