Nearly all the posts are bilingual.
Presque tous les articles sont bilingues.

English spoken. On parle français. (وكمان منفهم عربي، حبيبي)

Most of this blog's contents is subject to copyright. For instance, many of the latest illustrations I've made myself. I'm the cooperative type. If you intend to borrow some material, please contact me by leaving a comment. :-)
La plupart du contenu de ce blog est soumis aux droits d'auteurs. Par exemple, nombre des illustrations les plus récentes sont faites par moi. Je suis du genre coulant. Si vous comptez emprunter du contenu, SVP contactez-moi en laissant un commentaire. :-)

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Smileys season in Lebanon

Seems that in South Africa, the latest trend among half-breds, is to get their front teeth removed "to have a beautiful smile" (see photo). Uum-uum, it ain't no joke, baby! Dat's de trooth. And it makes one look so intelligent, doesn't it?
But these geezers are late. Direly. Ain't nobody more original than us Lebanese! It's been trendy over these parts for decades. As a kid, I used to see plenty in my village. (The most beautiful village in the world's absolutely most beautiful country, of course, you'll find it easily, can't miss it.) And it wasn't just among hip youngsters.
On a side note, it's darnedly convenient for spitting out watermelon seeds.
It's even said that some young men, in Tripoli, have found a specially romantic use for this style... But I haven't guessed what it is exactly.

Sometimes, we Lebanese do even better: the single, double, or three-toothed grin. Classy! (Even bordering on "bling-bling" at times, you might say. Aah ya jagal!)
Furthermore, over here, it's all 100% natural stuff, hayété. No plastic surgery is used to obtain that result, nothing but genuine tooth cavities, fully organic, exclusively from pure baklawa sugar.
Like I was saying in the previous post, it's full season in honor of our beautiful, brand new, all-exclusive, latest Government (the most beautiful of all Governments of the world's absolutely most beautiful country, I see there are a few among you lot who've actually been listening). So come quick and enjoy our wonderful smiles, there are bargains aplenty!
"Grins, smiles, well ripe, alive-alive-o, yalla ya basmét el-watan, 3assal ya basmét, yalla baladi ya hélo!"
Hello there, Mrs Tooth Fairy, how many kilos for you today?

Schupfer schexshy schmileysch[Image ©]

Il paraît qu'en Afrique du Sud, la dernière mode chez les métis, c'est de se faire enlever les dents de devant "pour avoir un joli sourire" (voir photo). C'est pas une blague, man. Sur ma vie! Et qu'est-ce que ça donne l'air intelligent, n'est-ce pas?
Par contre, ils retardent, ces cocos. Cruellement. Plus original que les Libanais, y'a pas! Ça fait des décennies que c'est à la mode, chez nous. Enfant, j'en voyais déjà partout dans mon village. (Le plus beau de tous les villages du plus beau de tous les pays du monde, évidemment, vous le trouverez facilement, on peut pas se tromper.) Et pas que chez les "djeunes" dans le vent.
Accessoirement, c'est vachement commode pour cracher les pépins de pastèque.
On dit même que certains jeunes hommes, à Tripoli, ont trouvé à ce "look" un usage particulièrement romantique... Mais je n'ai pas deviné quoi exactement.

Parfois même on fait mieux, nous autres Libanais: le sourire à une, deux, ou trois dents. La classe! (Limite bling-bling, même, par moments. Aah ya jagal!)
Et en prime, chez nous, c'est du 100% naturel, hayété. Pas de chirurgie plastique pour arriver à ce résultat, rien que des caries véritables, entièrement bio, au pur sucre de baklawa.
Comme je le disais dans l'article précédent, c'est la pleine saison en l'honneur de notre beau Gouvernement tout neuf tout nouveau tout beau (le plus beau de tous les Gouvernements du plus beau de tous les pays du monde, je vois qu'il y en a quelques-uns dans le tas qui suivent). Alors venez vite profiter de nos beaux sourires, il y a des promos en pagaille!
"Bien mûrs, nos sourires, tous frais pêchés, yalla ya basmét el-watan, 3assal ya basmét, yalla baladi ya hélo!"
Ah, bonjour Mme la Petite Souris, je vous en mets combien de kilos?


josef dyck said...

I didn't know they played hockey in South Africa.

Anonymous said...

...please where can I buy a unicorn?

Anonymous said...

merci pour intiresny Dieu

Anonymous said...

French is a dog language.

Anonymous said...


Pascal [P-04referent] said...

They do have rugby. Rather "manly" enough to get that result. Silvio Berlusconi just tried it... He fumbled the pass, but now he's "fashionable"!

Anon #4:
That mignt be a difficult sound to make if one follows this dental fashion.
More like "FLLLBBBLLLLBLLLLLNNNNAAAHTH!" for these handsome guys...

Anon #3:
WOOF, that was a harsh one! KENNEL you talk nicer? COLLAR your tone pink?
Honestly, monsieur, I think you're (human)being too RUFF. And GRRRReatly so. WAG's gotten into you? Maybe you're BARKing at the wrong tree aBOWt this issue, DOGnabbit! ARFter all, I heard that French dogs speak in excellent English, and are peRRRUFFectly understood by any anglo-saxon canine... (That is, before they FLEA, like typical frenchies.) Or is it just a PANTasy tall TAIL?
A really BEAGLE issue, and a HAIRY debate CATegory. Better not PIT BULL-s**t in the discussion. SCRATCH that, okay? Stop DIGGING into it and CHASING trouble. CURB that negative energy. HEEL my advice: you'd better pick yourself another bone to chew, mon ami.

WOOF-phew! Gotta log off now. I'm having bad weather in Lebanon tonight. It's raining cats and frogs!
(P.S.: Know anybody capable of TRAINING cats and dogs? Together? A circus buddy of mine in Vegas is interested.)

P.S.2: Anon#4,
"That was the poodle!"

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